If I were a nethack monster...

.?...| 
..)e.+#
....%| 

If I were a NetHack monster, I would be a floating eye. I see and sense absolutely everything that happens around me. I just don't do very much about it.

Which NetHack Monster Are You?

(And if I wasn't a floating eye, I'd be a water nymph.) Ho hum. Enjoy the rest of your weekend, I'm off to cast a spell of stink cloud. Or something.